Personal Discovery: Future Aspirations Part 3

Sometimes, though, it’s hard to even go forward and do that first little baby step. We have a fear that stops us, preventing us from accomplishing what we want. This is nothing to be ashamed about. Everyone has his or her own fears. The key here is to acknowledge that you do have fears and to figure out what exactly you are fearful of. What are the underlying reasons that are holding you back from going ahead? Where do those fears come from?

It is often difficult to face something new and difficult so we procrastinate and put it off. There’s no need for that. The first time will be hard and uncertain and possibly uncomfortable. So will the second time and maybe even the third time. If you keep doing it, soon it will become like second nature, instinctive and experienced. Try not to put it off for too long. It is better to work hard at first. The rest will be easier. The longer it is put off, the harder it will be to have the motivation to go ahead and the more difficult it may be to accomplish. Even, if in the course of pursuing a goal, you discover that this goal is something you don’t like, aren’t good at, doesn’t fit the person you are or want to be, or even all of the above, there is no need to perceive this as a failure or even a setback. Now we know even better where we are headed than when we first started when we figure out where not to go. Also, the skills and experience found in past experiences, even those not in the same category, can be very pertinent and useful in future pursuits. All experiences are worthwhile, as long as we are willing to figure out how to apply them.

“It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare; it is because we do not dare that things are difficult” – Seneca

Activity:

What’s the worst that could happen? Grab some paper and list your fears. Now, let’s play an imagining game. For each fear for a goal, write down the worst thing that you could think could happen. Make it a story. It doesn’t have to be realistic. Just write down the very worst scenario. Use your imagination and creativity. Now, read it over and ask yourself, how likely is this to happen?

Then take each part of your worst scenario and think to yourself, what would I do if this happened? How would I survive? What could I do with what I have? Again, use your imagination and creativity. Think outside the box. Now, even though the fear may still be there, you now have an action plan to combat it with. If you ever start thinking, what if this happens? Think about your action plan.

Finally, we have to figure out what success means to us anyways. Your definition of success is based on the person that you are and what you want to accomplish in your life. See if you can distill it down to one sentence. This definition of success will help you focus your strivings and let you know when you have reached it. Without a proper definition, you may never know when you have reached success so you will always remain just short of it. In some cases, this is useful in pushing yourself forward but eventually, it can lead to a perpetual dissatisfaction with your direction in life. Know what you are striving for and go make each day a success.

“The trouble with not having a goal is that you can spend your life running up and down the field and never score.” – Bill Copeland